Author Topic: Harassment  (Read 14978 times)

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Offline Titus_Love_Doll

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Harassment
« on: August 16, 2011, 07:15:02 pm »
Heres a qustion.

A good friend of mine last year was herassed by a cosplay group about how bad her costume look. she dosent have an account on here so i am asking

She is wondering what she can do when this happens beside ignore
2) she is also wondering What should she do if someone tries to start a fight with her. she as a temperment issue and really tries not to let things get to her. last year she got the groups name but didn't say anything about it. becuse it was a large con from what she is use to
« Last Edit: August 16, 2011, 07:36:15 pm by randompvg »

Offline Jacob_Blackfeather

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Kumoricon 2011 Policy Questions
« Reply #1 on: August 16, 2011, 07:16:51 pm »
Heres a qustion.

A good friend of mine last year was herassed by a cosplay group about how bad her costume look. she dosent have an account on here so i am asking

She is wondering what she can do when this happens beside ignore
2) she is also wondering What should she do if someone tries to start a fight with her. she as a temperment issue and really tries not to let things get to her. last year she got the groups name but didn't say anything about it. becuse it was a large con from what she is use to

Titus you need to go to the staff because it's against con rules to harass anyone let alone a cosplayer. If you don't go to the staff then nothing can be done if it happens this year again go to the staff they are very understanding.

Offline Titus_Love_Doll

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #2 on: August 16, 2011, 07:37:22 pm »
kinda not asking this for myself this is more for my friend and even with staff this type of thing is need to now by becuse. I've seen it myself.

Offline Jacob_Blackfeather

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #3 on: August 16, 2011, 07:39:44 pm »
Titus if you see it report it alright I can even take you to the youji they are good people :3

Offline Titus_Love_Doll

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #4 on: August 16, 2011, 07:49:09 pm »
EVen so But not alot of people now when they are being herassed or understand what to do when they are herassed I now were to go. and who to talk to but not everyone dose. I feel that everyone should now.


1) I bring up this topic but it is important i now alot of people at con. are going with friends or people from their schools and alot of the time these minors  can be herassed and attacked by fellows students or peers. I want everyone to be safe at con and have a safe con enviorment.

Offline Jacob_Blackfeather

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #5 on: August 16, 2011, 07:51:18 pm »
Yes and that's a good thing to stand up for I want the con to be good and a fun place to hang not a drama filled sob fest. People should enjoy their time not feel pain.

Offline Titus_Love_Doll

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #6 on: August 16, 2011, 07:56:57 pm »
of course rember mewcon* that was not a good year Ive never had a good con becuse drama or some type of herassment broke out at the con. Ive dealt with alot to a point were i didnt want to go I didnt go in 2009 becuse of a threat. from anouther person who went to con. who was a classmate of mine. These things are very important and can not sit still and ignored. SAFF needs to watch what gose. on around con. When they see herassment they need to aporch it thats what makes a safe con.

Offline Jacob_Blackfeather

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #7 on: August 16, 2011, 07:58:05 pm »
yes and on top of that we got to remeber that hormones will be raging they are teens after all. So if you see something get heated pull one of them away and let them cool down it helps a lot more then people think it does.

Offline @random

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #8 on: August 16, 2011, 08:14:16 pm »
I'm sorry to hear about her bad experience. It's really sad to hear that anyone misses the point of the con so badly as to think it's about hurting other people. The very best part of the con is just the opposite, getting to know people who are a lot like us... and a lot different. Just because someone acts a different way, wears different clothes, watches different TV shows, that doesn't make it okay to act hurtfully toward them.
(If you ask me, that misses the point in more ways than one.)

As far as who to talk to goes - any staff member will be able to direct you to the right people, but probably the best in this regard are the yojimbo or anyone in the staff offices (which will be a lot more visible this year).

We can't prevent such things from happening... we have a lot of stuff going on, and it would be impossible to listen in on every conversation. But we'll absolutely do our best to keep it from continuing. Please come and talk to us if you see this happening, whether to yourself or to someone else, and we'll get to the bottom of it as quickly and fairly as we can.

http://www.kumoricon.org/policies, in part, says
Quote
All attendees are expected to treat others in a courteous and respectful manner. Harassment and solicitation are prohibited. This is not only our policy, but the law. Please let the staff know if you are witness to any of the following:

Harassment
  • Offensive or rude behavior toward anyone
  • Someone doing or saying things with the willful intent to harm another person
  • Heckling

^ If someone doesn't understand this, we'll be glad to explain it.
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Offline reppy

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #9 on: August 16, 2011, 09:23:48 pm »
My guess is that a lot of this stuff happens outside of con space.  In that case, besides simply leaving the area, and assuming the harassment was verbal and not physical, is there anything the person can do?

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Offline Washougal_Otaku

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Re: Kumoricon 2011 Policy Questions
« Reply #10 on: August 16, 2011, 10:29:34 pm »
Look for a member of Yojimbo; that's the best way to have this sort of thing handled.
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Offline flyinvee11

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #11 on: August 17, 2011, 12:34:35 am »
My guess is that a lot of this stuff happens outside of con space. 

Very good point. I would say, haters gonna hate - just retreat back to conspace and if they pull the same junk there, report it up.

Offline superjaz

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #12 on: August 17, 2011, 10:03:51 am »
Yup, also info booth would also be a good place to report, tho any staff around should be able to help in some way even if it to find a another staff better equiped to help. in any case if you can get their names or badge# from there badges that should be displayed, if they are not that is something else you can report to a staff available
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Offline Titus_Love_Doll

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #13 on: August 17, 2011, 11:44:12 am »
yup. I agree but sometimes this dose happen ina nd out of conspace  but as I said I really want everyone to have a good year even for those whos going to their first con

Offline AllyKat

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #14 on: August 17, 2011, 01:32:54 pm »
I have a very anecdotal story about this from last year:

Making my way to the subway off con-space, I met a couple girls who were VERY upset because a young man had just cat called and harassed them. They didn't know what to do. As it happened my fellow Director at the time, Brandon De Vore of operations, was out at that moment with a few of his higher ups and we were able to get a description of the young man responsible. The young many further exacerbated his situation by harassing our registration manager of the time.

PRO TIP: If there is one thing you NEVER under any circumstances do at this convention, its make fun of any of our male staff for wearing cross-play or cross-dressing. I could probably count this double if it's Reg staff cause they already take so much stress at con.

So, we did what we as Directors are wont to do in this situation; we kicked the little bugger out.

Harassment of ANY KIND is not tolerated by any of your convention executive staff. And while pulling a badge or telling someone to hit the pavement is a Director level action, please oh please look for a staff badge nearest to you and give them EVERY DETAIL POSSIBLE about the situation. We don't take kindly to people making con un-fun for anyone. I don't really care what your excuse is or how many conventions you've been to or how loyal to Kumoricon you are; you start picking on, harassing or making fun of any other attendee, staff member or person on our convention grounds, and prepare to meet the eternal wrath of a very angry Director. The hotels wont tolerate harassment either, and they can kick you off property completely. Authorities can be called, this can get serious.

We wont escalate until you tell us though, we can't go around with a secret police force instilling fear into the hearts and minds of every attendee... so, kinda like on the MAX:

See something? Say something. Don't keep quiet cause we are here specifically to make a fun con, harassment, is not on the fun list of things.

Hope that helps, and I hope you and your friend have a safe and fun convention this year.
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Offline TalaRedWolf33

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #15 on: August 21, 2011, 12:41:46 am »
From a first hand account i can tell you, and being the same way as your friend titus, that the best way you can help her is to watch over her and be there for her. Yes, you can tell the staff, as you should but sometimes that doesnt help the person effected by the harassment. What happened to me at my first and second cons was horrible. Made me not want to go again. None of my friends were there for me, which only made me scared to go back.

Offline Ichi_Kagetora

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #16 on: September 05, 2011, 11:54:58 pm »
Titus if you see it report it alright I can even take you to the youji they are good people :3

^^^This is the best advice you can get. Don't ver take these situations into your own hands. Yoji can pull badges if the hazing is too much.,
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Offline kylite

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #17 on: September 06, 2011, 12:07:45 pm »
To clarify, a Yoji cannot pull a badge, but we can get one of the directors down to make the call.
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Offline Ichi_Kagetora

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #18 on: September 06, 2011, 01:47:37 pm »
Ahh sorry for my ignorance...
When I am chasing my tail and catch my back leg instead, I will not bite down on my foot. This hurts, and my scream scares my human.

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Offline kalagei

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #19 on: September 06, 2011, 01:53:18 pm »
I have a very anecdotal story about this from last year:

So, we did what we as Directors are to do in this situation; we kicked the little bugger out.

<3 Ally I feel bad for the reg manager that year, but I love telling that story >.>
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Offline Titus_Love_Doll

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #20 on: September 21, 2011, 09:16:57 pm »
This year was better then last though i got herassed by a random stranger and his girlfriend and i almost got into a fight. >> but had to hold back becuse it wasent the right thing to do and the guy was bigger then me. =.=

Offline Chromophobic

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #21 on: September 22, 2011, 12:45:20 am »
Seems I got harassed alittle bit this year. Not like uberly bad. People just insulted my costume for it not being perfect. =/ Sure, I understand constructive criticism and giving me ideas on how to improve my cosplay is a great thing. But saying "Oh your cosplay sucks because your missing this" and "You should change out of that cosplay cause you look horrible in it" is not right.
« Last Edit: September 22, 2011, 12:45:37 am by Chromophobic »

Offline Titus_Love_Doll

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #22 on: September 22, 2011, 12:59:36 am »
Seems I got harassed alittle bit this year. Not like uberly bad. People just insulted my costume for it not being perfect. =/ Sure, I understand constructive criticism and giving me ideas on how to improve my cosplay is a great thing. But saying "Oh your cosplay sucks because your missing this" and "You should change out of that cosplay cause you look horrible in it" is not right.

I saw you at con and i loved your costume  i even comment to you that i liked it becuse you had put nice effort into getting it done I really hate people who do that and say rude things my friend made her tomberry and so many people were rude to her about it as well Ignore them and keep up the good work and next person who says it just tell them that atlest your is speshial becuse you worked hard on it

Offline Chromophobic

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #23 on: September 22, 2011, 01:10:01 am »
^Were you the gothic Lizzy?

And thank you for the nice comments! Alot of people this year (please no one take offense to this..) seemed stuck up about cosplay. Cosplay means having fun. Thats were the "play" part comes in. At least thats what I think. Seriously, some people this year needed to take a chill pill and keep their mouths shut. We have feelings, too.

Offline Titus_Love_Doll

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #24 on: September 22, 2011, 01:21:02 pm »
^Were you the gothic Lizzy?

And thank you for the nice comments! Alot of people this year (please no one take offense to this..) seemed stuck up about cosplay. Cosplay means having fun. Thats were the "play" part comes in. At least thats what I think. Seriously, some people this year needed to take a chill pill and keep their mouths shut. We have feelings, too.

< i didn t wear my gothic lizzy a friend did :D but i was there in PJs as PJ lizzy when i was you

Offline Chromophobic

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #25 on: September 22, 2011, 03:37:42 pm »
^Okay! Now I remember you! ^_^

Offline Washougal_Otaku

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #26 on: September 24, 2011, 03:11:11 pm »
PRO TIP: If there is one thing you NEVER under any circumstances do at this convention, its make fun of any of our male staff for wearing cross-play or cross-dressing. I could probably count this double if it's Reg staff cause they already take so much stress at con.

Thank you, Ally! ;D
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Offline Titus_Love_Doll

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #27 on: September 24, 2011, 06:14:02 pm »
PRO TIP: If there is one thing you NEVER under any circumstances do at this convention, its make fun of any of our male staff for wearing cross-play or cross-dressing. I could probably count this double if it's Reg staff cause they already take so much stress at con.

Thank you, Ally! ;D

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Offline Washougal_Otaku

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #28 on: September 28, 2011, 01:23:47 am »
*hugs Titus*  I love you, too, my friend!

The thing that I find odd about a lot of the criticisms that take place at cons is that most of us were (or are) picked on at school or other public settings, or maybe even by family members, for being nerds (or geeks or whatever).  You'd figure that we'd be more inclined to be supportive of each other, rather than tearing each other down.
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Offline TomtheFanboy

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #29 on: September 28, 2011, 07:13:24 pm »
*hugs Titus*  I love you, too, my friend!

The thing that I find odd about a lot of the criticisms that take place at cons is that most of us were (or are) picked on at school or other public settings, or maybe even by family members, for being nerds (or geeks or whatever).  You'd figure that we'd be more inclined to be supportive of each other, rather than tearing each other down.

That's odd.
I thought for sure you'd been on the internet for more than a month.  ???
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Offline Washougal_Otaku

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #30 on: September 28, 2011, 10:09:28 pm »
^ Huh?
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Offline hikaru_maxwell

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #31 on: September 29, 2011, 12:14:40 am »
>.< I think Tom is making a comment about the fact that despite us all being anime fans, video games fans, cosplayers, and geeks, the internet has proven time and again that not all of us are nice. If we were, net places like lolita****, /cgl/, etc wouldn't exist. Sadly, sometimes the harassment people feel they can get away with from behind the computer comes out during cons as well....even though that is supposed to be a place we can all go to to have fun and feel like we belong.

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Offline Washougal_Otaku

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #32 on: September 29, 2011, 10:21:59 pm »
Okay, that makes sense.
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Offline Animeman73

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #33 on: December 24, 2011, 08:44:32 am »
First off I can assure everyone here that this Older Anime fan will NEVER insult anyone's costume. My wonderful redhead mother taught me to know better than that. But alas it's true not everyone at a convention or on the internet is going to be nice. The fault there usually lies with the parents or the attitude the parents gave or didn't give. For these people I suggest sighing and turning to walk away. But if they keep on your case then it would be a wise idea to find a way to get a hold of a director for a judgement call.

Not everyone out there is as open-minded or as unique as us anime fans. But that's the narure of the strange creature known as humans. Being legally blind and autistic and I can tell you that I've had more than my fair share of experiences with the best and worst of humanity.
« Last Edit: December 26, 2011, 05:31:33 pm by Animeman73 »
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Offline Titus_Love_Doll

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #34 on: December 24, 2011, 06:11:06 pm »
First off I can assure everyone here that this Older Anime fan will NEVER insult anyone's costume. My wonderful redhead mother taught me to know better than that. But alas it's  true not everyone at a convention or on the internet is going to be nice. The fault there usually lies with the parents or th attitude the parents gave or didn't give. For these people I suggest sighing and turning to walk away. But if they keep on your cse then it would be a wise idea to find a way to get a hold of a director for a judgement call.

Not everyone out there is as open-minded or as unique as us anime fans. But that's the narure of the strange creature known as humans. Being legally blind and autistic and I can tell you that I've had more than my fair share of experiences with the best and worst of humanity.



amen to that thank you sweetie.!

Harassment at con and even on con fourm should not happen at all. we are all people so please keep in mind that harassment is a very big thing at cons . and that you all should know what it is and known when it is happening to you. Even non con goers will and could harass you. Also ladies I will recoment carrieding peper spray with you at night! There are men out there who are sexual prediters who will sexually harass you when wearing costumes. that are reviling. or gose into their fantacys. always walk in groups and be on Guard NEVER go with anyone who says they are at the con stick with your friends Young women as well I can not stress it enough always keep your phone on you or peper spray. Trust me One year walking aroudn portland a friend of mine was being sexually harassed by a few drunk gentalment who tried lifting her shirt  and was grabbing at her breat and bottum. lucky an officer walked by and stoped them from doing anything els to her. Always be on guard and know when you are being harassed sexualy or any other type of harassment as well if you are report to constaff with the person name/bage number or call an officer if the person is not of the con and will not leave you be.

Offline @random

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #35 on: December 25, 2011, 05:41:42 am »
One year walking aroudn portland a friend of mine was being sexually harassed by a few drunk gentalment who tried lifting her shirt  and was grabbing at her breat and bottum. lucky an officer walked by and stoped them from doing anything els to her.

They only stopped them from doing anything else?  :o

Any officer who witnessed that and didn't drag them down to the station in handcuffs should be canned, posthaste. >:(#
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Offline Titus_Love_Doll

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Re: Harassment
« Reply #36 on: December 25, 2011, 12:13:29 pm »
They were taken care of and charged with herassment she went to court on it. also they got child molestation becuse she was only 16 at the time as i said you cant stress it enough