Author Topic: Does anyone really care  (Read 3710 times)

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Offline RandomCosplay

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Does anyone really care
« on: August 16, 2008, 08:47:13 pm »
I have just started getting into cosplay and my boyfriend tells me how much fun it is and how great people are but i am not feeling how great people are. I feel that I have been used yet again because i have transportation and am too nice. I thought that maybe I could make friends and so could my boyfriend (since he is new to Oregon), but I feel like have not made any friends who like me for me. So i guess i am stateing that if i dont make friends through this cosplay than i have been let down by many people who have told me that cosplayers help eachother out. I want to state that I might not be able to go to Kcon due to the fact that I might be homeless and not have my family much longer. My life is getting worse and I have no one to turn to for help. I wish I had friends to talk to and count on but i guess i am meant to be a loner for good dont know guess we will see.  :( :'( :'( :'( :'(

Offline Darknight2433

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #1 on: August 16, 2008, 09:04:21 pm »
Well, I'm sure if you just wait a -bit- longer, you're sure to make friends in no time! It's true that cosplayers help each other out, but if you can't help another person, then that's fine. They're still your friends. If you are having trouble finding people who don't just freeload and take your money, then maybe we could hang out sometime if you go to Kumoricon? I could introduce you to my friends and we could all have a great time! Again, no matter how much you can help a friend, it all depends on just being a friend.

I know I sound sappy, but it's the truth. XD And I hope you get through your troubles. If you need someone to talk you, we're all ears, 'k?

Offline pinkrandomattack

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #2 on: August 16, 2008, 09:18:15 pm »
yeah, con folk are generally pretty friendly outgoing people. 

but im not sure if you've made the best first impression. ive noticed you asking for money, and thats a little jarring from someone you don't really know yet.  all sorts of weird stuff happens on the internet, and these forums have seen their share of fake accounts and strange people in the past.  tough stuff happens to people everywhere, and it sounds like you're definitely having some hard times,  but maybe throwing that out there right away isn't the best way to make friends.  a positive outlook can work wonders, even if you really aren't feeling all that great about things.


although i cant really speak for those people who are going to be getting a ride from you. i know how that can be, it seems like not very many people are both licensed and with-car (lets not even talk about insurance) these days and when people need to get places all of a sudden that person with access to the working car is their best friend. 
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Offline nikkiolie

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #3 on: August 16, 2008, 10:37:03 pm »
Also posting the same things in every board gets very annoying. If someone had the extra time and money to help you make a costume then I'm sure they would...but if you don't get a response then you don't need to make a new topic about the same thing.

Offline makichan

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #4 on: August 16, 2008, 10:49:35 pm »
Wait wait wait, if you just got into cosplay, you're making a pretty quick assumption, am I right? If you can't make it to the con there's also free events and hang outs that are always going on. As for the "not feeling how great people are" part, I'm confused xD
I think that most of the people on here are generally good people but that's just me  :-\
« Last Edit: August 16, 2008, 10:51:26 pm by makichan »
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Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #5 on: August 17, 2008, 07:48:11 am »
the only reply I agree 1st reply one my girl and I have not mad the best 1st inpession or whatever but we made the atemt to show up to some of the free meet ups and not only did a few show formth but the other paid no mine even tho I showed up with the music I feelit so out of place that day the only ones that show kindness was a few we talk to still from time to time but one thing I did not like about the picnic was I got alot of stairs like I was not aloud to be my girl feelit eyes peering into her we stayed till the end not saying anything about what was going on in our life but was there to hear some beker about theres so why are we haven all up on us when we dont go on you I just wanted my girl to enjoy the con not feel out of place so I asked for a few in cash did not ask for all 80 you talk about trying to get a car wash for the skateing on ice ant that asking others for cash as will??? and its not that we r trying to sound like beggers I just want to have fun and my girl to fit in my cosplay is done but hers is not we dont even have it how would you feel if you r in a group and r the only one not cosplaying? uh I hope that makes you see why I even got up and asked like I said I usely never ask ppl I beerly know!!! now I see why ppl have a big thing about turning it back into a negative thing..............

This is the girlfriend....

I was told by fellow cosplayers that we take care of eachother and now i am seeing that that is just a lie and you all just really care about yourselves. I never knew what my boyfriend was doing but I can tell you his intentions are good, He wants me to go and has been trying to help me get a cosplay outfit to fit in. I will state that I thought cosplayers were better kinder people who just want to have fun and help eachother. You have make me feel like cosplayers are a bunch of stuck up snobs. We only needed a little help to cosplay and are willing to pay back since money is tight at the moment. But I bet you never looked into that.

Offline EveofAbyss

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #6 on: August 17, 2008, 08:57:42 am »
Okay, I wanted to stay out of this but you guys have come in here from day one getting very defensive against anyone saying anything about you or to you. You may not know it but from your first post you have given of the air of a problem. People want to be warm and welcoming to others, and for the most part those at the con are (I know this), but you know, when someone seems to have trouble stamped on their forehead (or even a post or two), it is kind of a stigma and it makes it harder for people to want to get involved with those people.

You compare your situation to the Car Wash that is going on. Well, they really are not related. You asked for money on a public forum, the car wash is people working to earn money for a group cause. Do you not see the dissimilar qualities here? I'm sure if people really had the money to give, they would want to give it, but you come here and ask for people to help you out when the majority of us are scrounging for cash just to meet our own needs. Surely you can see how you getting all frustrated and judgmental at us for not helping you is pretty unfair, considering the circumstances?

Anyway, I don't want to be the one to lead an attack or anything like that, but I just needed to point out that you have not really given anyone the greatest first, second, or even fourth impression to work with. That's all.


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Offline nikkiolie

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #7 on: August 17, 2008, 09:00:42 am »
We do tend to take care of each other but asking some people to help you make a costume a month before the con is a little unreasonable. It can take a long time to make a good costume. It could be done in a month if nothing else was going on, but you need to keep in mind that everyone else is trying to finish their costumes too. A lot of people are doing really hard costumes and they haven't really started so they will be swamped till con. Most people end up finishing their costume the night BEFORE con starts. As a cosplay you should know that this happens a lot so if you want someone to make a costume for you, you should ask much much sooner. Then I best someone would be happy to help.

I am constantly busy. I work a lot and the days I am not working I always have something planed. I hardly have enough time to make the last minute touches I want on my own costume so making one for someone else is way out of the question.

Offline Higuma

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #8 on: August 17, 2008, 10:37:44 am »
I remember meeting you guys at the cosplay picnic and I know everyone was very nice to you and your son who played with my son alot and some other cosplayers who were there. What more can you expect from people you have met only once? All of us have our own problems in life, hell I just looked at my bank account this morning and I am freaking out because there is less in there than I expected, but I am not about to start a post asking for money from people who I have only met once or twice. Seriously what else did you expect? There is not need to put all of us down because you don't know us. Now I hate to be the one who deals out the tough love here but grow up. Me and my family got kicked out of out apartment about 2 months ago and almost ended up homeless, but I worked my ass off to resolve the situation and not blame others for my problems. So far everyone on here has been very nice to you, given you advice on how to fix some problems with your roommates and you start attacking us because we won't or can't throw some cash your way?

Offline makichan

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #9 on: August 17, 2008, 12:13:28 pm »
Okay, so now that you have a bad impression of a large mass of people worldwide (and I'm sure that you're not going to be optimistic by people's explanations), I'd like to know what you think constitutes a friendly cosplayer?
You say that we only pay attention to ourselves but here we are paying attention to you and your needs yet again and I'm very curious... please, enlighten me  ::)
From what I can tell, you haven't been around long enough to make solid cosplay friends yet. That's basically like ANY social occasion. Whether it's school, work, an apartment building, etc. these things take time, usually. Now, you've seemed to create a negative way about you, giving us a poor judgment of character, because we can only be friendly so long before our human tendencies cause us to get defensive. I've been around kumoricon since '04 and I'd say that everyone is quite nice and never quick to exclude anyone, at least purposefully. we also have our own personal lives that can be quite a living hell (and boy, I have stories) but I leave it off of the forums because this is my escape. A place where I don't have to think about how messed up my life is outside of cosplay.
So what exactly is the deal, folks?
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Offline Higuma

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #10 on: August 17, 2008, 02:15:02 pm »
Okay, so now that you have a bad impression of a large mass of people worldwide (and I'm sure that you're not going to be optimistic by people's explanations), I'd like to know what you think constitutes a friendly cosplayer?
You say that we only pay attention to ourselves but here we are paying attention to you and your needs yet again and I'm very curious... please, enlighten me  ::)
From what I can tell, you haven't been around long enough to make solid cosplay friends yet. That's basically like ANY social occasion. Whether it's school, work, an apartment building, etc. these things take time, usually. Now, you've seemed to create a negative way about you, giving us a poor judgment of character, because we can only be friendly so long before our human tendencies cause us to get defensive. I've been around kumoricon since '04 and I'd say that everyone is quite nice and never quick to exclude anyone, at least purposefully. we also have our own personal lives that can be quite a living hell (and boy, I have stories) but I leave it off of the forums because this is my escape. A place where I don't have to think about how messed up my life is outside of cosplay.
So what exactly is the deal, folks?
well said.

Offline TohmaSeguchi

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #11 on: August 17, 2008, 02:35:50 pm »
Hold up here guys.

First to the guys who started this thread...

-I literally mean no offense to any of what I'm going to say, just the honest truth.

Starting off a thread with a title of: "Does anyone really care" indicates someone wanting either sympathy pity, or a helping hand. There's a defining line between the two, and when someone crosses it, it becomes rather obvious.

While cosplayers are generally nice people and are willing to help, you have to be careful of your choice of words. Otherwise people will be offended and not listen to you.

Like what other people said, posting practically the same thing on other threads is also considered spamming. No, I am not a mod or admin, just speaking my two cents.

Cosplaying is fun, and always fun in a group. Learn from one another, and not just stick to yourselves.

No, we're not snobs. But the way you are speaking to us, it seems a little hypocritical to me. Take a look around the boards and forum, you'll notice that everyone's friendly to one another, with no hostility aimed, purposefully or not.
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Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #12 on: August 19, 2008, 03:14:13 pm »
Sorry we are making seem like we are coming off like that. We are in a bind, we just asked in the first post that we needed a little help sewing part of a costume we have most of it taken care of, just that we really dont know how to sew. The other post about not being able to go to Kcon is because of my roommates but whatever. Anyway i thought that making posts was just to get things out and I guess i was wrong so I wont do that I will just talk about cosplay and anime stuff to lighten everyone and not make anyone mad. Again me and my boyfriend are truly sorry to have offended you all. I am the type of person who talks about my issues and what not so I am sorry on my behalf, i guess I just expected people to help and care as much i would have liked, but i see now that you do care and would help if you could. Please note that we really meant no harm in any of this. I hope you all can accept our apology and to see you at Kcon.  :'( :-\ :)

Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #13 on: August 19, 2008, 04:11:01 pm »
this is the Boyfriend I also want to say that im sorry to and to say sorry about how my girl makes things sound as well and by now I think you can tell us apart by how we type she can spell and use grammer and I can not and I want to say is that im vary open and honist about what goes on in my life and never had any prob asking for help in anyway shape or form becouse when my mom died I try to follow what I was told in like to be honist and never hesatat to ask for help plus my grandma was vary much like that to and being honist is how I made alot of my friends but there all back in vegas and I did try to use that way here and so far I have not made any friends that I can recall of just my girl friend but thats not what I ask and if an am able to post this video then I hope it also lightens the mood and oh for the cosplay help its basicly sewing  the fabric on the side to make it round then turning it inside out so not sew can be seen and we only r doing it for my legs and arms lol so its not that much time out of the way to do it we cant 1 we have no sewing mechien and hand sewing Im slow at and took 4 hours to get half way on one leg lol so if my girl can use a sewing mechine at some ones place for like 30 mins we can be done

guess I can post the video so heres the link
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9e_WIoJJnI

Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: Does anyone really care/SORRY
« Reply #14 on: August 26, 2008, 03:28:22 pm »
I am sorry to have made everyone feel like I was atacking them I wasnt. Please forgive me as I am just in an emotional state due to the condition my son might be in. Again My problems are my own and I will stop postin them and just chat about other stuff. I hope you can accept my apoligy and too see you at Kcon. ^_^

Luves to all

Offline Serika

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #15 on: August 26, 2008, 04:12:09 pm »
Go to JoAnns and use their sewing machines.  The end. 


Now, I'm pretty much an "outsider" within the convention group.  Oh well, life sucks.  There's not a lot I can do about it without drastically altering my personality to fit others' needs... And, surprise surprise, I'm not about to do that.  I have made friends at the convention.  I have made a very small amount of friends, but some nonetheless.  I did not make any friends my first day of my first con... Instead, I enjoyed the company of the friend I was with.  (Wait, scratch that, I practically raped fangirl'd a Zelos cosplayer and stalked him, but we didn't exchange numbers or e-mails or anything.)

You can't honestly expect to form lifelong bonds with a bunch of close-knit strangers your first day meeting them.  Even if they're not a clique or anything, you need to give it some time.  The impression I'm getting is that you mostly sat to yourself and waited for people to come to you.  Sorry, it doesn't work that way.  No one's going to be friendly with the people sitting by themselves.  Maybe I'm wrong, I wasn't there, and maybe you guys were going out of your way to talk to other people.  But still, this is a FIRST TIME THING?!!!!! and I've met one friend my whole life who I was able to form a strong friendship with on the first day.  I've made dozens of friends (lol), and most of them have taken awhile to become something stable. 

You're allowed to complain about things on the forums.  Go for it.  But this isn't a livejournal.  If you're going to insult us and accuse us of being HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE PEOPLE WHO JUST DON'T CARRREEEEE!!!!!!!!! then take it somewhere else.  You're just causing unneeded drama, and no one's going to respect you any more for bitching at us.  Now you're saying, "oooh, I'll talk about just anime and stuffs lol"

Yeah, thanks for belittling our interests and priorites.  Yes, there are a lot of people here who care about about only anime and will skip topics about, you know, Dr. Horrible and things.  But grouping us all as a whole is a little rude.  (Not to mention things in your first post...) Despite what this post is probably leading you to believe, I am a very caring and sympathetic person IRL (believe it or not!  haha).  And I would've been a lot nicer about suggesting going to fabric stores or renting machines from sewing centers had you not blamed us for all your problems.  We ALL have problems.  I'm dealing with being a lesbian in a very homophobic family. (Watch me point this out on every topic I go to!) I know other friends who use the boards who have family members with mental conditions, problems with their parents, problems with their own identity... Almost everything you can think of.  Don't treat us like we think we're above you because we're magical cosplayers who can be happy and exclude the "weirdos."


(mods can edit this for language if it's too bad... i'm not really sure what the rules are regarding this stuff.)
lol peer pressure

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Sakuracon '12: Ryfia (Arc Rise Fantasia), other things

Offline makichan

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #16 on: August 26, 2008, 04:40:27 pm »
Eh, let's drop it. An apology was made and we shouldn't hold anything against the current situation. Have fun at the con~*
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Offline Kayami

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #17 on: August 26, 2008, 07:37:23 pm »
This will be my second con, my first being Sakuracon (Seattle, WA) which took place this year.  I didn't really make any new "friends," but I did meet a couple of nice people, and we hung out for a while.  I also ran into one obnoxious jerk - you know, the kind who comes up to you and tells you your cosplay isn't perfect and you don't act as much like the character as you should blah-blah-blah?  We ditched him pretty fast, though. I also got some accusing stares from groups of hard-core cosplayers, presumably because I was dressed as Toph from Avatar: The Last Airbender...which isn't exactly anime.  >>;
All-in-all however, it was a pleasant experience.  The majority of people will return the respect you give them. :3

Offline CharlotteElbourne

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #18 on: August 26, 2008, 09:30:05 pm »
I can understand where you are all coming from, and I wont bring the argument back up now that it has been resolved and apologies have been given out.

I would like to offer my help in the cosplay situation, however.

I can sew pretty well and have already completely my cosplay outfits. I could help you if you wanted.

Also, if you cant finish your costume, I have a Kikyou outfit you could borrow to wear if you want ^^ Its in good shape, and I would only have to repair a tiny part of the pants. ^-^ :)

Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #19 on: August 27, 2008, 10:07:16 am »
Thank You all for caring. Again im sorry for being an idiot. That would be nice if you could help with sewing we are trying to sew gloves but have no clue how to make it work. I think I might have a costume already but might only wear it one day dont know yet on that one. If you could help us with my boyfriends costume gloves that would be great. Let me know soon thanks.

luvs

Offline CharlotteElbourne

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #20 on: August 28, 2008, 02:12:04 pm »
Thank You all for caring. Again im sorry for being an idiot. That would be nice if you could help with sewing we are trying to sew gloves but have no clue how to make it work. I think I might have a costume already but might only wear it one day dont know yet on that one. If you could help us with my boyfriends costume gloves that would be great. Let me know soon thanks.

luvs

Well, I have never made gloves before, but I think I might have an idea.

Take the material you have and make sure you have two pieces (the top and bottom of the glove) and put the rough sides on the outside with the soft sides touching. Pin it together enough to where it wont move if you mark on it. Then, trace your boyfriend's hand but make sure there is an inch of extra material all the way around. Then, sew it within a half inch of your hand and turn inside out. Lemme know if that works, and if not, you could always look up on google how to sew gloves ^-^

Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #21 on: August 28, 2008, 09:54:25 pm »
Thank you for your help we have actually decided to use sce bandages for his arms 1 cause i think it looks better and 2 it is kinda easier with Kcon just around the corner, well I hope to see you there and maybe hang if not that is cool too. Again thanks for helping out.

Luvs ^_^

Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: Does anyone really care
« Reply #22 on: August 29, 2008, 08:14:08 pm »
Ok so yeah we bought my costume and it never came so I am going to dress gothic lolita. For the one who offered to lend me the Kikiyo outfit that would be great if you could lend it just come find me and see what we can do. ^_^ Thanks